the things you may never see

Decisions

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Wed, 14 May 2008 05:31:47 -0500

I want my eye to expand and my voice to grow clear and strong.
That's the path I choose.
For the sake of my soul and the soul of the world.

I've never been so sure, inspired, or excited.

This summer I'm not leaving the country like I have 4/5 of the past summers, but I'm going on the largest journey I ever have.

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My mind is never enough...

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Wed, 07 May 2008 20:43:09 -0500

My mind is never enough
is never achieved by the mind
of humankind
reproduces & produces
a new reality to live in
control of all external
factors can override the internal
labyrinth hiding & protecting
us from the truth
we sense within our souls
across the world
resources are vanishing
illusions & mirrors are cracking
reality within our minds

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a few

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 19:08:24 -0500

Sensory overload
my soul with varied energies & colors
entwined to show perspectives & forms
new eyes on reality
doesn't discriminate against dreams
from the deep canyons of our minds
connect to convey an individual way
to leave this reality

Concrete words fill the air
seeping through cracks in the mirror of society
creates an illusion of individuals
existing within the whole
world waiting for a change
happens when words are made into actions
can be predicted & manipulated
into controversial words of dissent
fuels evolution & the exchange
between two worlds is limited
expression occurs within a mirror
shows what we are & what we have become
illusions of beings who can't be
defined by words

Sitting on a curb counting change
to have an orderly life from nine to five
people plea for change
is screamed for every May first
we're seen then we're heard & ignored
by the man in a suit & tie
together ideas of equality & freedom
can only exist when some are slaves
will never cease to work
the streets all day & night
we sleep and ignore the dreams
we had before settling
into a life of the mundane
is preferred when the alternate is suffering
on the dirty streets
searching for change

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dva/deux/two

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 01:15:47 -0500

We drink
the elixir of life
changes daily due to circumstances
uncontrollable by human ideas & plans
to escape fail without dignity
fades once the elixir has invaded
the minds of others
judge our decisions relentlessly
criticizing our search for domination
occurs when someone gives up
hope breeds insanity
sweeps away doubts
don't exist once the elixir is downed
in a field of flowers
fill the gardens of the submissive
citizens have given up
the elixir of life
dominates the mind of reason
falls short when dignity & choice
lose to simplicity & ease
your mind
will subside once the elixir
seeps through your soul

I feel I'm starting to realize life
is a spectacle for the pleasure of others
doubt I can overcome whatever plagues my mind
is never expanse enough
people have done what I chose
to be the most dominate force since democracy
defines my existance in this world
destroys dreams of creativity
reigns supreme in my future & present
situations prevent me from dreaming
or while sleeping I'll waste away
I'll drift out to sea
anything I can manage to see
with my eyes and my mind
will be more open
your eyes to realize
reality is more than you can view
through the blinders society gave to you
are not just a puppet
performing on a one-dimensional stage
in evolutionary history.

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hmmm

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Sat, 26 Apr 2008 23:03:19 -0500

I'm told,
money is all we need
oxygen, water, food, shelter
requires payment & rent monthly
money comes & goes with happiness
increases & decreases based on wealth
determines your quality of life
is a linear game & is defeated
by money alone
may you survive
in a black hole sucking up all
oxygen, water, food, shelter
from the endless
source of money
buying bombs, boobs, and beer
bottles rolling around the train
you call shelter
from the broken system
crashing once all money
magic ceases when people stop believing
god is green, paper, and everything
is restricted to a select few
rich individuals
may exist
through oxygen, water, food, and shelter
can be available to all
we need

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hmm

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Sat, 26 Apr 2008 22:07:54 -0500

Casually throw out coins
settled at the bottom of a rattling cup
of energizing, unquenching liquid
puddles forming next to a man
walking fast in shiny leather shoes
hanging by the last thread to the souls
remaining receptive to ideas
connecting people all over to people
controlled by green paper & metal coins
spread amongst a mountain of trash
replacing grass, dirt, and the whole Earth
suffers.

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hm

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 15:56:38 -0500

hand gliding up & down my back
& forth my foot twitches
into a sleepy, still soul-
ful scream of silence
deep within a dream
reality awakens the loudest
alarm clock rings, rings, rings
of the end, end, end
bones twitch and stretch
my veins crack
one reality so another reigns
all realities are illusions
of eyes watching
a heart connecting
a soul-
ful stretching scream
silences illusions
of grandeur.

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To do.

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 22:10:24 -0500

Log passing conversations & not so passing conversations on trains, buses, in cafes, restaurants, wherever.
I hear some weird & dumb stuff.

Read more feminist theory.
No one else should be told "you can't play drums because you're a girl!" (&so on)

Be in absolute silence.
Does it exist in our technology buzzing filled worlds?

Take more pictures. I always regret when I don't.

Make more music. "Theoretically correct" or not.

Open expand and so on.

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Home

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 14:16:28 -0500

My messy, cluttered home. Living room minus a clarinet & keyboard (with the greatest lights ever). Nadia's corner & door to backyard/porch. Kitchen (the 2nd greatest lights). Bathroom (yes, there's currently no ceiling). Bedroom. Me & koschka Nadia.

I really need to clean.

living room

back kitchen/koska area

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A short, lame poem to explain what I am

nobody@vox.com(wanderlust) — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 13:41:17 -0500

My heart
I gave to orphans.
My soul
Was swept away by the sea.
My mind
Belongs to the universe,
And my body
Was never really a part of me.

I am not something to be owned.
I am not simply one thing.
I am the whole, and the whole is me.

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